Talk:Smog: Difference between revisions

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<u>'''Comments copied from talk page of my sandbox where the article draft was created'''</u>
== Revised lede to incorporate many of the suggestions by Anthony Sebastian. ==
Anthony, I had already considered using the word "portmanteau" to describe "smog" ( as was done in Wikipedia's smog article ) but decided it was too "fancy". Therefore, I chose to describe it as a "combination" word, which is simple and self-explanatory.
Other than that, I believe I have incorporated your suggestions in my re-write of the lede while still retaining the technical integrity of the wording. For example, it is not the polluted air that produces the precursors ... they are emitted into the air by vehicles and industrial activities. Thanks much, [[User:Milton Beychok|Milton Beychok]] 04:40, 22 August 2010 (UTC)
== First comments ==
New York looks rather pretty in that picture. Designer smog?
:Maybe the photographer used a color filter or maybe that is what it really looked like at that moment in time. [[User:Milton Beychok|Milton Beychok]] 22:21, 22 August 2010 (UTC)
Personal taste, but I hate "so-called"; it tends to imply doubt of the term. Certainly, there was a 1952 event in London.
:Done. [[User:Milton Beychok|Milton Beychok]] 22:21, 22 August 2010 (UTC)
The first paragraph of  "photochemical smog" doesn't seem to be about photochemical smog. Move it up to the previous section, and observe there's the original kind, but most now is photochemical, as a transition. Consider subheads in this section, perhaps "precursors" and "simplified reactions".
:I think the first paragraph of  "photochemical smog" is okay where it is ...but let me think about it a bit. [[User:Milton Beychok|Milton Beychok]] 22:21, 22 August 2010 (UTC)
:Added the subheads for "precursors" and "simplified reactions", but a bit more wordy. [[User:Milton Beychok|Milton Beychok]] 22:25, 22 August 2010 (UTC)
Under "areas affected", make the headings consistent at country level. Haven't there been significant British incidents besides London? Birmingham vaguely comes to mind.
:Country level headings done. There probably have been other significant British incidents. Perhaps others can add them after I upload the article into the article namespace. [[User:Milton Beychok|Milton Beychok]] 22:21, 22 August 2010 (UTC)
In the US, while LA is obviously the poster child, my informal impression is that Denver is worth mentioning, along with its particular topography. I'd be interested in hearing your opinion on their banning of wood-burning fireplaces. What about Pittsburgh before the industries cleaned up? Was that smog or some other air pollutant?
:As for Denver and Pittsburgh, again perhaps others can add them after I upload the article into the article namespace. As for banning wood-burning fireplaces, I have no opinion. [[User:Milton Beychok|Milton Beychok]] 22:21, 22 August 2010 (UTC)
::I have now added a subsection on Denver. [[User:Milton Beychok|Milton Beychok]] 02:15, 23 August 2010 (UTC)
As far as my birthplace of northern New Jersey, I'm not sure we called it smog, or necessarily air...just the burning tires, refinery waste, and Pig Farms of Secaucus, all fermenting over the Jersey Meadows. I remember holding my ground when someone, in a college lab, smashed a 5-pint bottle of butyric acid, and the professor said "you're from New Jersey, aren't you?"  (turns out that it cleans up nicely with a slurry of activated charcoal in cupric sulfate solution).
--[[User:Howard C. Berkowitz|Howard C. Berkowitz]] 20:29, 22 August 2010 (UTC)
== Continental Europe ==
The first thing I noticed was that continental Europe is not mentioned.
Are the air pollution problems of this region not classified as smog? I think that, at least, 30-t40 years ago there was indeed smog.
Now we have ozone warnings, and "Feinstaub" (fine dust?) warnings. --[[User:Peter Schmitt|Peter Schmitt]] 08:43, 23 August 2010 (UTC)
Oh, not Europe, but certainly important: Beijing. --[[User:Peter Schmitt|Peter Schmitt]] 09:24, 23 August 2010 (UTC)
:Peter, the exclusion of Europe (other than London) was not intentional. Just did not run across any references that discussed smog in Europe. I will make an effort to find some. Thanks, [[User:Milton Beychok|Milton Beychok]] 15:45, 23 August 2010 (UTC)
:: Of course, you know that you need not contribute a complete article ...
:: As for Beijing: You may remember that they made special efforts to improve air condition during the 2008 Olympic games. --[[User:Peter Schmitt|Peter Schmitt]] 23:38, 23 August 2010 (UTC)
:::Yes, Peter, I know that I need not write a complete article before uploading it into the article namespace ... but I like to make it as complete as I can, in a reasonable amount of time, before it leaves my sandbox. I have been doing that for over a year now. But thanks anyway. [[User:Milton Beychok|Milton Beychok]] 03:06, 24 August 2010 (UTC)
== Some minor revisions and a suggestion ==
Hi Milt,
I did a few edits directly and like the article as it is. The only thing I find not clear is the selection of the affected areas to be covered in detail &mdash; I think this would benefit from some sort of global ranking in terms of smog indicators. For the US, I found [http://www.stateoftheair.org/2010/city-rankings/most-polluted-cities.html this list], and for the world, there are [http://www.wonders-world.com/2010/03/world-most-polluted-cities.html similar] [http://www.mibazaar.com/pollutedcities.html lists]. --[[User:Daniel Mietchen|Daniel Mietchen]] 21:31, 25 August 2010 (UTC)
:Daniel, thanks for your edits. The only one that I changed back to the original form was the TOC location which I feel results in a better overall appearance. Other than that, all of your revisions were fine.
:As for the selection of the affected areaa, to be candid they were selected because I thought they were good examples of severe smog  and also because I could find interesting material about those sections. Admittedly, more researching could disclose more to write about ... but the article struck me as large enough as is and I had already spent a couple of weeks on it, so I stopped researching. [[User:Milton Beychok|Milton Beychok]] 21:43, 25 August 2010 (UTC)
<u>'''Comments after the article was loaded into article namespace'''</u>

Revision as of 17:18, 25 August 2010

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 Definition The hazy, unhealthy polluted air which accumulates over cities and other regions under certain conditions. [d] [e]
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Comments copied from talk page of my sandbox where the article draft was created

Revised lede to incorporate many of the suggestions by Anthony Sebastian.

Anthony, I had already considered using the word "portmanteau" to describe "smog" ( as was done in Wikipedia's smog article ) but decided it was too "fancy". Therefore, I chose to describe it as a "combination" word, which is simple and self-explanatory.

Other than that, I believe I have incorporated your suggestions in my re-write of the lede while still retaining the technical integrity of the wording. For example, it is not the polluted air that produces the precursors ... they are emitted into the air by vehicles and industrial activities. Thanks much, Milton Beychok 04:40, 22 August 2010 (UTC)

First comments

New York looks rather pretty in that picture. Designer smog?

Maybe the photographer used a color filter or maybe that is what it really looked like at that moment in time. Milton Beychok 22:21, 22 August 2010 (UTC)

Personal taste, but I hate "so-called"; it tends to imply doubt of the term. Certainly, there was a 1952 event in London.

Done. Milton Beychok 22:21, 22 August 2010 (UTC)

The first paragraph of "photochemical smog" doesn't seem to be about photochemical smog. Move it up to the previous section, and observe there's the original kind, but most now is photochemical, as a transition. Consider subheads in this section, perhaps "precursors" and "simplified reactions".

I think the first paragraph of "photochemical smog" is okay where it is ...but let me think about it a bit. Milton Beychok 22:21, 22 August 2010 (UTC)
Added the subheads for "precursors" and "simplified reactions", but a bit more wordy. Milton Beychok 22:25, 22 August 2010 (UTC)

Under "areas affected", make the headings consistent at country level. Haven't there been significant British incidents besides London? Birmingham vaguely comes to mind.

Country level headings done. There probably have been other significant British incidents. Perhaps others can add them after I upload the article into the article namespace. Milton Beychok 22:21, 22 August 2010 (UTC)

In the US, while LA is obviously the poster child, my informal impression is that Denver is worth mentioning, along with its particular topography. I'd be interested in hearing your opinion on their banning of wood-burning fireplaces. What about Pittsburgh before the industries cleaned up? Was that smog or some other air pollutant?

As for Denver and Pittsburgh, again perhaps others can add them after I upload the article into the article namespace. As for banning wood-burning fireplaces, I have no opinion. Milton Beychok 22:21, 22 August 2010 (UTC)
I have now added a subsection on Denver. Milton Beychok 02:15, 23 August 2010 (UTC)

As far as my birthplace of northern New Jersey, I'm not sure we called it smog, or necessarily air...just the burning tires, refinery waste, and Pig Farms of Secaucus, all fermenting over the Jersey Meadows. I remember holding my ground when someone, in a college lab, smashed a 5-pint bottle of butyric acid, and the professor said "you're from New Jersey, aren't you?" (turns out that it cleans up nicely with a slurry of activated charcoal in cupric sulfate solution).

--Howard C. Berkowitz 20:29, 22 August 2010 (UTC)

Continental Europe

The first thing I noticed was that continental Europe is not mentioned. Are the air pollution problems of this region not classified as smog? I think that, at least, 30-t40 years ago there was indeed smog.

Now we have ozone warnings, and "Feinstaub" (fine dust?) warnings. --Peter Schmitt 08:43, 23 August 2010 (UTC)

Oh, not Europe, but certainly important: Beijing. --Peter Schmitt 09:24, 23 August 2010 (UTC)

Peter, the exclusion of Europe (other than London) was not intentional. Just did not run across any references that discussed smog in Europe. I will make an effort to find some. Thanks, Milton Beychok 15:45, 23 August 2010 (UTC)
Of course, you know that you need not contribute a complete article ...
As for Beijing: You may remember that they made special efforts to improve air condition during the 2008 Olympic games. --Peter Schmitt 23:38, 23 August 2010 (UTC)
Yes, Peter, I know that I need not write a complete article before uploading it into the article namespace ... but I like to make it as complete as I can, in a reasonable amount of time, before it leaves my sandbox. I have been doing that for over a year now. But thanks anyway. Milton Beychok 03:06, 24 August 2010 (UTC)

Some minor revisions and a suggestion

Hi Milt, I did a few edits directly and like the article as it is. The only thing I find not clear is the selection of the affected areas to be covered in detail — I think this would benefit from some sort of global ranking in terms of smog indicators. For the US, I found this list, and for the world, there are similar lists. --Daniel Mietchen 21:31, 25 August 2010 (UTC)

Daniel, thanks for your edits. The only one that I changed back to the original form was the TOC location which I feel results in a better overall appearance. Other than that, all of your revisions were fine.
As for the selection of the affected areaa, to be candid they were selected because I thought they were good examples of severe smog and also because I could find interesting material about those sections. Admittedly, more researching could disclose more to write about ... but the article struck me as large enough as is and I had already spent a couple of weeks on it, so I stopped researching. Milton Beychok 21:43, 25 August 2010 (UTC)

Comments after the article was loaded into article namespace